All right. It's Halloween and I've got a special treat for you. Watch, appreciate, watch again.

End of the World

Why wouldn't anyone carve a turd into their pumpkin?

Also, I've been thinking about becoming hooked on drugs. Not because I like drugs, but because I'd love an intervention. Everybody you know gathering together and telling you how much they love you? Where do I sign?

Longest update ever.

Something somewhere is backing up. How long will it take for it to stop?! The beeping continues, and I'm afraid I'll never get a full night's rest.

A hotdog was found! Praise God, Allah, and whichever creepy looking thing you worship.

I have to decide which classes to pick for next semester. Where's 'Pimp Stizzyle 101'?

Maroon 5 is the new Weezer. Also, I miss hotdogs. Somebody please find me a hotdog.

Mixing singing and crying produces awkward sound. Trust me.

Pimps in the front, 'ho's in the back, and the chumps in the trunk, brotha.

Jason rocked my sox. Parking at UNI blows.

I've done everything to make myself disappear for 3 days. This better be worth it, Mraz.

I'll never again drink milk; it makes me gurgle. Bring on the calcium pills.

Weekend Tally:
1 missed opportunity
2 bagels eaten
10 pounds of hair lost
4 pictures of me in senior yearbook
1 teriffying discovery
250 miles driven
3 girlies kissed

I'm in the worst pain of my life, and it wasn't even caused by women. Deep...

Ahh... the comforts of home. What do you call this? ...2 ply quilted? Felt like heaven.

"I don't think I'd be able to directly pee on you. I would probably have to do it in a cup, and then pour it on you."

Thanks, sweetheart. Glad to know you're there when I need you.

I guess I spoke too soon. The men were back today, and I am awake. What are they even doing? Is all this noise really worth hot water for the environmental center? The answer is no.

Going home in 27 hours. On the to do list:

-hold hands with Jean
-totally make out with Sophie
-piles of dirty laundry
-get full nights rest
-do entire Wall Street Journal powerpoint
-eat ice cream

That's all for now. Get back to your actual life.

Well, here we are. You and I. Do you have anything you'd like to say for yourself? I thought not. Don't expect me to lead a conversation with myself. You must have me confused with your own disgusting sub-conscious.

News update: I have to pee. Also, left-cheek sneak attempts come with no guarantee. You see, you have to attempt at your own risk.

My bed remains dirty and full of bugs. Well, it's not like it's teeming. But you know how one bug is too many?

Constuction continues on Forest, but my interrupted sleep has ceased. Have I become accustomed to the grinding?

Right now is all about: table tennis